I know… the title implies a little negativity, but hear me out. There are selfish people out there…and you’re one of em. I am, you are, everyone is. So allow me to explain myself. What do I mean by this? Well it’s quite simple, really. So let’s start off with the definition of being selfish and allow me to elaborate on what I feel my own definition is:
From the archives of Merriam Webster:
Now upon reading this definition. One can assume that if people are selfish then they have no regard for the feelings and welfare of others. In some cases, it’s completely true. But I have another outlook on selfishness and I would like to think it’s a little more relevant to the majority of the world’s population.
So what do I mean by this? What do I mean when I say that people are selfish?
Well, to explain that people are selfish I like to think of the word: “selfish” I relate it to a “What’s in it for me?” attitude. In other words, if I do something for someone else. Or if I strive to achieve something…what’s in for me? What do I get out of it? Still, this does sound rather negative in relation to the definition above; but let me explain my theory with a few examples that I hope makes sense.
If you were to help an elderly lady cross the street. Most would say that it is an unselfish act. You’re not getting anything out of it. You’re putting your time and effort into helping this woman cross the street without any regard to compensation. Let alone gaining any sort of advantage in life.
But let’s look deeper into this. Let us ask the “why”.
So why would you help this lady across the street? If you’re anything like me, it’s because you recognize that she could probably use the help and she would most likely appreciate the gesture of kindness…and more importantly…
…how would it make YOU feel? Wouldn’t you feel good about yourself knowing that you were helping someone?
I believe it’s safe to say that in most cases, if a situation arose where you got absolutely NOTHING out of it. If whatever it was gave you no sense of fulfillment, no “feel good” feelings…that you wouldn’t think to go out of your way to do it. The fact is that the majority of people naturally WANT to help someone with a need. To prove this, how many times have you taken time out of your life to help someone with a question? It’s almost an instinct that if someone has a question that you know you can answer you want to jump in and rescue them with an answer or solution.
I relate this concept that people are selfish to my mother and I. I’ve always been a “mama’s boy”. Every week she will call me and ask if I can run to the grocery store for her. Or if I can head over to her house and do the dishes or mow the lawn and if my schedule is open, I gladly come over and help in any way I can. But I do this not only because I love my mother, but because I feel good about myself knowing that I am helping her. I feel good knowing that offering my help to her will allow her to feel a little less stressed out.
This is the point that I’m getting at. People ARE selfish; but not in the way that society understands the word.
It’s one thing to do something that only benefits you with disregard to others. For example…there are so many “marketing gurus” out there that are ultimately only out to get your money. Sure, they may have a product that has decent information but for the most part, it’s the same hashed out crappy information worded differently to sound like something new and innovative. This is a true example that those people are selfish.
But there are a small handful of marketers out there who DO genuinely want to help you. People out there who WERE in your situation. Who didn’t have a dime to their name. Who discovered a way to make a living and achieve their financial goals. Who want to spread the word that anyone can do it. On a side note of this site. You’ll find that any article I write I strive to be as descriptive and informative as possible in hopes that it my readers can apply what I’m trying to teach. Sure, I have a few affiliate links out there. But they are links that I personally use and KNOW that will help. I’m not just trying to get a buck, I’m trying to help those who want to achieve the success they deserve.
My challenge to you is to keep this concept in the back of your mind. When you’re about to do something that may seem selfless, ask yourself why you’re really doing it. If you’re doing it out of the kindness of your own heart, WHY are you? Will it make you feel better? Will it make you feel better knowing the other person you’re helping will think highly of you? Don’t worry, people are selfish and so are you, but for the most part…that’s not a bad thing. 🙂
Thanks for reading.